Member-only story
Processing Feedback
A.k.a. Don’t Lose Your Cool
Here is what most writers forget. You are the boss of your own story. Not the other writers in your critique group. Not the famous author whose workshop you were lucky enough to get into at the Arkansas Summer Writing Festival. Not even your mother-in-law who comes into your house while you are at work and finds your script only to redline nearly the entire thing page by page. When it comes to applying feedback, you — and only you — are the one who gets to determine what stays and what goes in your story.
Why do so most writers forget this fact? Why do most of us, when confronted with feedback, automatically relinquish authorial control and start scribbling copious notes all over our scripts determined to meet everyone’s demands?
“Yes sir, I’ll rewrite the whole screenplay in first person and add more sex scenes, no problem.” “No ma’am, I don’t need to kill off the grandfather in the end. I thought he was a nice guy, too.” “Yes sir, I’m sure my life story would sell better if I was raised in a Japanese orphanage. I’ll get on it right away.”
When processing feedback, most of us need assertiveness training, if not for the sake of our stories then for our mental health. For one thing, you will never be able to please everybody.
